A LONG AND WINDING ROAD

THE ANGELUS TRUMPET           

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A LONG AND WINDING ROAD

Dateline: Deadwood SD, March 5, 04:01:11

by Matt Hughes

Today Biblical Archeology Digest (BAD) archeologist O. Toby Norske was again in the news when he revealed the most recent set of runic records found near Jordan Creek, in Harmony, Minnesota. According to these records, Jesus left a life in Harmony and traveled into the western wilderness.  He may have been the first to follow the advice, “Go West, young man.”

Norske’s work is important because it moves research from the Jordan Creek area in southern Minnesota into the greater North American setting. Norske said, “We started looking for places where Jesus might have gone, based on Biblical accounts of course, and other ancient sources. New findings in the ghost town, Deadwood, SD, suggest that the wilderness west journey could have ended there. At an average 15.7 miles per day (a very reasonable walk in those days), Jesus could have ended his forty-day journey in the wilderness crossing most of Minnesota and South Dakota.”

Ayne Shent (St. Olive, ‘02), one of BAD’s Norwegian antiquity scholars, helped with the research and was present when some preliminary diggings were initiated. The whole team was shocked when they found a stone with identical markings as the Jordan Creek find. This tends to confirm Norske’s hypothesis.

The writings on this stone purport that Jesus traveled into the western wilderness and was tested. Jesus rejected spells as ways to solve the world hunger issue, but Shent notes that this part of the nation has been known as the “great bread basket” for many years.

The stone further claims that Jesus was taken to the pinnacle of what we now know as the Corn Palace where he refused to leap without an appropriate bungee harness and line. Lastly, he was taken to the highest point in the Black Hills, where he surveyed the wonders of the western lands, and he again declared them good.

After the mountain-top experience, Jesus found himself where angels ministered to him. Norske now believes that the end of the testing time concluded in Cactus Flat (a popular stop today to visit a prairie dog village) because, he explains, “From the rune stone, we now understand that the word we usually think of as ‘angels’ really means ‘prairie dogs’. This would suggest that Jesus was transubstantiated or teleported in some way from place to place. Otherwise, he wandered all the way to the Black Hills and then returned part way, and then proceeded to Deadwood, another five- or six-day journey by foot.“

The terminal location of Deadwood is suggested by the cross event itself. The dead wood is the signature name of the cross and has been made famous because of it. Norske said, “What comes out of these new writings is how maniacally focused the inquisitor is and how casual Jesus is in the midst of it.”

As scholars continue to process this new information, Shent shared that some wonder whether this narrative suggests a first uprising of aboriginal first-nation people against the misunderstood intentions of an early Viking expedition or whether the leadership of that fated expedition was in fact Jesus and that he was a Viking rejected by an unknown adversary.

Maybe Jesus is Norwegian after all.