HICKORY DICKORY DOCK or 3 BLIND MICE

THE ANGELUS TRUMPET           

The Unexpurgated Source for Alternative Bible Facts

 

HICKORY DICKORY DOCK or 3 BLIND MICE

In a startling report, Josh Kristy disciples are revealed to be blind.

Dateline: Galilee, February 26, 17:01:09

by Matt Hughes

Following is a transcript of last evening’s broadcast courtesy of our news affiliate ATTV: “If it’s news, it’s where we’re AT.”
Earlier today, Josh Kristy took with him Peter, James, and his brother John, who most think are his closest disciples, and led them up an undisclosed mountain. This reporter was able to follow at a distance and report these happenings to you through enhanced long-range digital camera and sound equipment.

It appears Kristy took these three disciples with him because, unbeknownst before now, they are blind, thus limiting their ability to attest to the strange occurrences that transpired at the ad hoc summit meeting where Moses and Elijah were also ostensibly in attendance.

As the film begins, you can clearly see that Kristy’s appearance is dramatically different from that at his recent gatherings. His face is glowing brightly, and his clothes are sparkling white. The level of brilliance is high enough to distort the image, yet the disciples seem to be unaware. They stand together apparently preoccupied with their own conversation.

In this next clip, two apparitions, most likely Moses and Elijah, join Kristy in what appears to be a serious communication of import and still the disciples seem unaware. They continue to be preoccupied by their own concerns.

And here, you will notice one of the disciples, most likely Peter, tugging on Kristy’s sleeve, still apparently unaware of the spectacle before them, but excited about something.

In this last clip, a cloud, unlike anything our meteorologists can describe or explain, appears, and, when isolated lightning and thunder were seen and heard, the disciples fell flat on their faces as they tried in vain to seek shelter.

And now we see Kristy helping Peter, James, and his brother John, up onto their feet and hiking back down the mountain.

We asked our local specialist on paranormal occurrences, Dr. Yule Ceboetter for his opinion of Kristy’s disciples’ reaction. “Well, it is possible that the intensity of the brightness was such that their retinal sensors were overloaded and ceased to function, but, I believe, that, if you look at your earlier shots, they indicate that they were climbing, using walking sticks and holding on to one another on the way up the incline. The film is not clear, but they certainly could be white canes suggesting that they were blind before this unusual meeting took place.

Ceboetter continued, “Clearly, blindness is the only explanation for their nonchalance at the beginning of this paranormal event. Any normal person would have been overcome by such extranormal events and would have exhibited physical reactions such as cringing or at least shading their eyes. Here you see none of this. In fact, at the end of the second clip, we see Peter tugging on Kristy’s sleeve without any show of noticing the circumstances around him. Yes, in my considered opinion, they all must be blind.”

Ceboetter further opined, “But not deaf. You will notice in the third clip that they all fell down as soon as there was thunder. This would indicate that the lightning did not impress them, but the thunder certainly did. This would confirm, I think, that they are all blind, but not deaf. I am just so delighted that we have this permanent record of what really went on there.”

Ceboetter’s opinion was further substantiated when I caught up with Kristy and his disciples. When asked about the appearances at the summit events, John replied, “What appearances?” Before I could follow up, he rushed off, saying, “I’m sorry, Josh is about to speak, and I want to listen to him.”

This reporter had not considered the importance of blind faith before this. I had always thought it was a figure of speech.

PERFECT, Matthew 5:38-48

As we come to the end of the fifth chapter of Matthew, roughly 1/3 of the way through the Sermon on the Mount, we encounter some of the most difficult language thus far. “Do not resist evil doers.” Really? I am just going to say that this is a less-than-helpful translation from the Greek. The people who heard these words first had a great advantage.

1. They knew the times they lived in; therefore, they did not need to have the context of the times explained to them.
2. They understood Jesus’ words and didn’t have to have them translated.
3. They knew that just these eleven verses were not the whole sermon. They knew more was coming that would more fully explain what it meant to live in the kingdom of heaven, and
4. They didn’t have someone standing in front of them trying to explain what Jesus meant without the context of the whole sermon.

So, as we come to the end of our reading of Jesus’ words for us in Epiphany, understand that we will be coming back to other parts of his sermon throughout the year. Indeed, part of the sermon is assigned for Ash Wednesday, just a week and a half away. These words will continue to challenge us as we wrestle with what it means to be the body of Christ for the sake of the world.

Before talking more about Jesus, let me tell you a story. Emma stood in the middle of the room screaming with tears running down her face. Her mother came into the room and asked, “What’s the matter?”

“Johnny hit me,” Emma shrieked.

“She hit me first!” Johnny retorted.

“That’s enough.” Mom said. “Say you’re sorry to one another and give each other a hug.”

Emma and Johnny looked at each other for a long time, and then each of them mumbled, “I’m sorry.” Then they hugged. As they hugged, Johnny whispered, “Tattle-tail,” and then he began to squeeze as hard as he could. Emma held her breath and started to get a little red in the face, but stubbornly refused to say anything. Finally, Johnny released her. Emma stepped back and kicked Johnny in the ankle as she appeared to lose her balance from the hug.

Mom said, “That’s better. Now play nice. Lunch will be ready soon.”

As she left the room, Johnny picked up a block and threw it at Emma. She ducked the block, and, putting her head down, she butted Johnny in the stomach. Suddenly, a hand grasped each of them, and Mom’s voice, no longer conciliatory, said, “That’s it. Go to your rooms and don’t come out until you can be friends again.”

Be honest. Don’t you wish that the problems of Syria could be solved this way? Or, don’t you wish the issues surrounding our last election could be solved like this?

Now I could tell you that the whole argument got started because Johnny broke Emma’s favorite crayon, or I could tell you that Emma wouldn’t answer Johnny when he asked her what she was doing, but little of that will change the fact that Emma and Johnny are living in an eye for an eye, tooth for a tooth (plus a little interest) world. It is this tit-for-tat world that Jesus wants to address.

“Stop escalating the violence!” Jesus says. Understand that Rome is in power and returning punch for punch with Roman power will only get you crushed. Power does not rest in muscular strength, power rests in endurance and peace. Therefore, when the Roman soldier tells you to carry his load for a mile, smile and carry it two miles. If you show that you are willing to carry the load, you take away the soldier’s power over you.

“Yes,” Jesus says, “there is evil in the world, but if you are my follower, then you do not need to respond to evil with evil’s methods. Instead of responding to evil with evil, respond in a way that recognizes the person in front of you as a person. Treat that person as you would like to be treated, because, if what you see before you is an enemy and that person is stronger than you, then you are always going to be crushed.”

This is the beginning of what Gandhi understood. This is what Martin Luther King, Jr. understood. If Gandhi had organized an army to fight the British, we would be living in a very different world today, but instead, Gandhi chose to turn the imperial power of the British against itself.

Martin Luther King, Jr. did not organize people around him with great speeches of strategy, planning the overthrow of white privilege and power. He spoke to the nation with words of hope and vision. He did not speak of strategy but of dreams. How differently we would have heard “I have a strategy…” rather than “I have a dream…”.

It is sometimes hard to imagine what a world of de-escalation might look like, and so I wish to share this story with you. In the early days of the Massachusetts Bay colony, John Winthrop noticed that his wood pile was diminishing much faster than he thought it should. Suspecting someone of stealing wood from his wood pile, he was enraged. So, he decided to wait in the shadows one night to see who was taking his prized wood. Around midnight, one of the men from the colony who had fallen on hard times, showed up and started to load up some of the wood. Stepping out of the shadows, John Winthrop said, “Friend, I see thou hast need of wood, and I have plenty. Help thyself to what you need.” John Winthrop wrote, “In this way, I ended the thievery.”

God has given us so much—enough to share. I know that there are times when that sharing makes us feel uncomfortable, but, when we remember that God’s abundance is for all of creation, not just those who believe, or not just for those who believe like us, we begin to have a glimpse of God’s amazing love for all of God’s people and the privilege we have been given to share the news of God’s love—a love that reaches beyond the category of enemy to person; a love that goes beyond our differences and embraces our common needs; a love that does not objectify those around us with labels of black and white, male and female, old and young, gay and straight, abled and disabled, Republicans and Democrats, residents and foreigners, English-speaking and some other language, Lutheran and pick your denomination, but as children of God’s loving creation. Christ died once for all. And we build on that foundation waiting to be tested.

The Lord told Moses to tell the people, “You shall be holy for I, the Lord, am holy.” Indeed, we are separate from the world because God is separate from the world. We are “In the world but not of it,” as Luther has said. And we are perfect as God is perfect—not perfect in the sense of being without sin, but perfect in the sense that we are complete, whole, what God has created us to be. We are one in Christ.

As we have heard in the Sermon on the Mount these last few weeks we are blessed, not by our own work, but in Christ’s love; we have been assured that our saltiness is restored in Christ, and our light shines out in Christ; our righteousness is fulfilled in Christ; and we have learned the ways of Christ; so now we find that our wholeness, our holiness, our perfection, is not from us, but from Christ himself.

As we are gathered in worship today, hear these words of Christ for you.

“You are blessed, that is, you are assured of God’s presence in your life. Christ is with you.”

“You are the salt of the earth and light to the nations.” That is, you are essential qualities needed for the body of Christ to continue in health and to thrive.

“Your righteousness will exceed that of the scribes and the Pharisees.” That is, through Christ, all things are possible and our ability to raise people up from the valley of the shadow of death’s darkness into the resurrection of Christ’s light is our mission and ministry by grace, through faith, in Christ alone.

And having learned what it means to be followers of Christ, “Do not escalate the level of violence in the world. Be wholly perfect as your Father in heaven is wholly perfect.”

Sometimes You Feel Like a Nut, Matthew 5:21-37

The old commercial used to say, “Sometimes you feel like a nut, sometimes you don’t.” Today I say, “Sometimes you have to take the Bible literally, sometimes you don’t. Sometimes you have to take the Bible metaphorically, sometimes you don’t. And sometimes, you have to take the Bible metaphorically and literally at the same time. Welcome to the Sermon on the Mount.”


For the past couple of weeks, we have been talking about this new community that Jesus is creating and forming. It is a new world vision that includes all of God’s people. So once again, let’s review the people who are gathered on the mountainside. They are the people who have come from all of Syria, Galilee, Jerusalem, Judea, and the land beyond the Jordan. These people are the diseased and infirm, those who have mental illness, the epileptics, and the paralytics. These people have come with their care takers and followed Jesus up the mountain.


Here, on this mount, as we witness a new community being formed, we are reminded of Moses in the wilderness—how Moses went up the mountain and came back down with the Ten Commandments. When the people, like Moses, come down from this mountain, they too, will have a new understanding of what it means to be God’s people in the world and to be a follower of Jesus. These words will give identity to the people and shape the attitudes and conversations engaging the world. These words will also shape the mission and ministry of the nascent church while developing an ethic and vocabulary for considering our place in the world.


Jesus is speaking to the people gathered before him on the mountain, and, at the same time, he is speaking to us in his distant future. He is using extreme language, setting the bar low enough so that we will attempt to live by them, but high enough so we know that it is only by God’s grace that we will be able to claim these words as our own.


Sue got her degree in economics, and though the subject of economics continues to confuse me in all kinds of ways, she helped me understand at least part of the economic conversation by telling me that there are two major conversations of economics that are always going on; sometimes they even talk with one another. There is the conversation of macroeconomics which is about the financial concerns of the nation and the world economy and there is microeconomics which deals with household spending.


I use this image of macro and micro as a way of suggesting how Jesus is speaking to us, giving these commands as both a macro- and as a micro- ethic. It is not just for the people who are there, but for those that we will come to know as the followers of Jesus. We will call them Christians. Just as Moses gave the Ten Commandments as guides and mandates for the greater community of faith, not for individual piety and self-righteousness, but for the entire nation of Israel, we will claim these words of Jesus as guiding words for ourselves today.


The Ten Commandments were given as an identifying signature symbol to the world stating why these particular Hebrew people were different. They were for all of God’s people who had come out of Egypt and also for the generations of people who would follow them. These commandments were given to help the people live together in peace with a common set of rules among the families and tribes, and guidelines for being in relationship with the nations/peoples around them. These commandments were at the same time, macro- and micro-.


In this sermon, Jesus does not mention all of the commandments, nor does he address the commandments in the order that we received them from Moses. Jesus also references some of the great number of the laws given in Torah as he talks about these new ways of understanding them.


Jesus begins “Don’t murder.” On a micro-, personal level, this commandment seems pretty straight forward. On a macro-, national level, this command becomes much more difficult. Yet Jesus does not stop with that complication, he makes it even more difficult. If you are going to be my follower, if you are going to be the people who will exceed the righteousness of the scribes and the Pharisees, then I say, “More than do not murder, don’t be angry with one another. Don’t get trapped in the pettiness of insulting one another. Don’t declare that others are fools.”


I need just a moment to talk about why, when Jesus says, “but I say,” it was so controversial for the people hearing this in Jesus’ time. A rabbi didn’t speak by his own authority but by the authority of other rabbis, past and present, who had influenced his thought, and with the authority of Torah itself. Many of the sayings and thoughts cited were from Moses. A rabbi borrowed the authority of Moses by reiterating Moses’ words, saying, “With Moses, I say …” or, “I will teach you as it is written in Torah (the first five books of the First Testament, sometimes referred to as the law)”. The rabbi also included the opinions of other rabbis who were in agreement with the history of the faith and in agreement with him. Thus, rabbis spoke with the authority of those who had gone before them.


A rabbi traveled around the country seeking out the brightest and the best of the young boys who might be worthy of becoming his disciple. While rabbis were teaching their own students, they offered up their own ideas derived from the arguments and teaching of others. When their students brought those teachings forward, they did so with the authority of their teacher. These students then taught saying, “As Rabbi so-and-so used to say, ‘this is what we should be thinking and doing.’” A rabbi, unlike Jesus’ statements, never really spoke with his own authority, but with that of a consortium of others.


It was understood that the only one who could speak with his own authority and without the voices of other people was Godself. Therefore, now understanding a bit about rabbinical authority, we can understand what authority Jesus claimed when he said, “You have heard it said in ancient times, don’t murder, but I say to you….”. Jesus’ words are so powerful because he is claiming the authority only allowed to the Son of God.


The people, both then and now, having heard these words, must determine whether Jesus was some sort of flim-flammer con artist, or whether he has the authority of God, indeed is God. If Jesus was a flim-flammer, then they, and we, don’t have to pay any attention to him. Today, we could just go home, go eat breakfast or brunch, prepare to take a nap. We could do any number of things that might fill our time in oh so many ways. We might even go to the mall to pick up a few things that we think we can’t live without.


But, today we are gathered proclaiming that the one speaking, one Jesus of Nazareth, is the Son of God, the Word of God incarnate. We are now accountable to living our lives differently: when issues arise that might divide us, we will try to remain friends instead of becoming adversaries. We will seek ways to be reconciled to one another, that is, we will make concessions for the sake of the other.


Just in case you think that this process of being reconciled to your neighbor is only for personal relationships, the micro-ethic, Jesus intends this is how national and local communities should interact with neighbors as well, the macro-ethic. In all relationships, Jesus urges do not be angry or vengeful, do not insult a neighbor, not even pointing out foolish behavior. Rather, Jesus demands reconciliation so that the value of the neighbor is not diminished, weakening the whole body of Christ.


This reconciliation is not “You need to change”. It is “We are willing to change in order for you to be part of us” reconciliation. This language suggests that “being reconciled to” means that we will make accommodations for the needs of our neighbors in order to walk together in Christ.


We know the early Christian worshipping community was divided over different ways of becoming Christian. In First Corinthians, we hear that some claim Apollos, others claim Paul. We know that some thought that it was necessary for a person to convert to Judaism first, and then, after they had become Jewish, they could begin Catechism to become Christian. We also know that the Gospel of Matthew was probably written in Antioch, Syria, and that the Christian community had gathered there to escape the Roman army in Jerusalem. So, as Matthew is recounting Jesus’ Sermon on the Mount, he is reporting it to a highly polarized, divided faith community. They are people who want to distance themselves from one another in self-righteous fervor trying to say that one faction is better than the other. They are more concerned about their faith positions than they are about what Christ has done for all of them. So, Matthew includes this divided community with all the other outcasts of the world when he speaks about Jesus’ concerns about divorce and adultery.


When Jesus talks about divorce, his words seem to be talking about the breakdown of a personal relationship (like with the person we are married to), but adultery and divorce, in the scriptures we call the Old Testament, have more to do with our communal relationship with God than they do with marital conditions. They are more macro= than micro-. In Jeremiah 31:31-34, God says that, although we have not been faithful to God, God will not divorce us. We may divorce ourselves from God, but God will not divorce us. Instead, God will write God’s laws on our hearts, and God will remember our sins no more. So, when Jesus speaks about adultery and divorce, Jesus cautions us against turning away from God and chasing after other gods for false gratification and salvation and moving outside that relationship that God desires to have with us.


These words are for Christ’s body, that is, the people gathered in worship, and address the divisions that come within that community of faith, with the many gifts of Christ’s body, his hands and his feet, his eyes, ears, nose, and mouth, who are gathered together for the sake of the world, seeking wholeness. So, Matthew reports that Jesus has said that when the eye or the right hand has caused the body to sin, remove it. This is not for the personal body, although there are times when surgery demonstrates the value of removing diseased appendixes, cancerous or severely infected organs like gall bladders and more, these words are written for the good order and the overall health of the body of Christ and caution us concerning outside philosophies and faiths.


It is better amid irreconcilable differences that one part of the faithful separate from the other until future discernment can find wholeness again. In this light, the Reformation, started by Luther’s actions 500 years ago, was a better way to go than to continue to fight within the Roman Catholic Church. Although we have not found wholeness together yet, we are now able to understand each other better than we have for many years.


So, at Jesus’ feet on the side of the mountain, seated with the first people gathered there, and with the divided community of Antioch, and within the midst of our own polarized and divided world, let us hear these words again that encourage us to be the new community of faith with new understandings of who this Jesus is. This understanding affects the way we live individually, but, more than that, it calls us as one of many communities of faith to honor those around us in ways that we have not in the past.


This is not a time for warfare and separation. It is not a time of hurling insults at the people who disagree with our communal beliefs. It is certainly not a time to call those who differ from us fools thereby increasing the chasm of distrust that separates us. It is not a time of chasing after easy solutions that dishonor the value of our neighbors. These words of Jesus pledge us to the commitment of seriously engaging the problems of the community we live in, embracing those problems in a way that says, “These are the concessions that we are willing and able to make to accommodate the needs of our neighbors. These are our theological non-negotiables concerning who Jesus is and whose we are, and, if we can’t agree on these things, it might be better for us to go our separate ways for the sake of the health and welfare of the body of Christ.”


Continuing in this community God has given us, as we sit and hear these words with those who heard it first, let us come down from the mountain, to live in the ways Jesus has proposed, not only with the words of “Do not murder, do not commit adultery, do not swear falsely using God’s name wrongly,” but with those added admonitions that help us live in healthy ways and loving relationships with one another.


In the relationships of faith which we have with one another, let us not swear in ways that dishonor God and God’s children: not by heaven, for that is God’s; not by the earth, for that is God’s; not by the city of Jerusalem, for that belongs to the government; not even by your head because you did not create it. Instead, when we engage with one another in honest debate concerning honest differences, let us openly say, “Yes, we can do this,” or, “No, we can’t.” In this way, we will be able to walk together in new ways. We will walk together in the way of forgiveness that is needed for our own spiritual health and ability to embrace life, not to change the behavior of the other person or group. We will walk together in the new way of making concessions to accommodate our neighbor, not because it will make our neighbor more acceptable to us, but because it will strengthen our community of faith and the body of Christ. We will walk together in these new ways, being honest in our relationship with God and one another, celebrating the gifts we have been given; not divorcing ourselves from God or one another; and not chasing after the new latest thing or idea that draws us away from those relationships.


In a divided world, in this time when the world continues to want to swear by flags and constitutions, by guns and walls that will only divide us, and by the wealth and lifestyle we have, let us remember and recognize God’s authority to create and forgive, and let us remember our calling to be the new welcoming community of God’s people and our willingness to serve in Christ, simply saying yes and no in faith.

GETTING MARRIED IN THE MOURNING

THE ANGELUS TRUMPET            POLITICS

The Unexpurgated Source for Alternative Bible Facts

GETTING MARRIED IN THE MOURNING

Dateline: Galilee, February 19, 05:38:48

by Matt Hughes

Josh Kristy continues to challenges today’s morality and our legal systems, surprised many by instructing his followers not to resist evil doers but to let them run rampant. He even suggested that his followers overpay plea bargain settlements by 100%. Further, after suggesting that young men enucleate eyes and amputate hands, Kristy presented extreme pacifist ideas counselling against fighting back when attacked. Kristy went so far as to say we should give our hard-earned money away to anyone who asks for it.

Ernest Workman said, “Soon our young men will be half blind, disabled, toothless, black eyed, impoverished, and likely homeless. If we give everything away to those who ask for it, who are we going to ask for money when the time comes?”

New insights into modern marriage practices among Kristy followers and an explanation of the rising divorce rate came when Kristy told his followers to love their enemies. Kristy said, “Anyone can love people who love them. The trick is to get your enemies embroiled in loving relationships, and then prey on them.”

When interviewed, Don T. Ghethitcht explained, “This makes it so much easier to be with the one you love. I used to think that I needed to look for the perfect woman, but now I just put my arms around whoever happens to be there. I’m bound to experience some antagonism from her, and then I figure that’s the one to love. I was so confused until I heard that I was to prey on them. It really simplified the whole dating thing.”

Mary Annie Thyme was heard to say, “This changes my whole attitude toward war. I mean, I never thought about the other side as being a whole new market for wedding bliss. I just wonder who my bridesmaids should be?”

Bar Association spokesperson, Sue M. Dailey opined, “This could change how we think about divorce. It used to be that people fell in love with one another, and then, over time, they became enemies or, worse than that, indifferent to their partner. It now seems that hatred and thoughtlessness is grounds for getting married. If they fall in love with one another, will that be grounds for divorce? I’m sure that there is a new legal precedent waiting to be proved in court. This should keep lawyers busy for years to come.”

You Are the Salt of the Earth, Matthew 5:13-20

“You are the salt of the earth!”

“You are the light of the world.”

“Your righteousness will exceed the righteousness of the scribes and the Pharisees.”

As we begin, let us remember who the gathered people are in today’s Gospel reading. These are the people who have come from all of Syria, Galilee, Jerusalem, Judea, and the land beyond the Jordan. They are the diseased, the infirm, the mentally ill, the epileptics, and the paralyzed with their care takers. They are the outcasts, the forgotten, the trampled on, the hidden, the invisible ones of society; and they have followed Jesus up the side of the mountain. These are the first people Jesus tells, “You are the salt of the earth!”

A few years ago, I read a book called Salt: A World History. It begins with some interesting points. One is that, if we don’t eat enough salt, in a year, we die. We have no way of making salt in our systems so we must find it elsewhere in the world. Indeed, much of human history is consumed with knowing where salt can be found. It is so fundamental to our world that one of the things we still depend on, our salary, comes from the word for salt. Roman soldiers were partially paid in salt, hence, they received their salary.

Another point is it is thought that we became such good hunters because we first tracked other animals who could smell salt and were seeking salt themselves, and then we killed and ate them when they had found the salt to preserve it for ourselves. One of the reasons that the Hebrew people settled near the Dead Sea, the lowest point on the earth, is because they could mine the salt cliffs and evaporate salt from the sea. It had great value, almost as much value as water.

As time went by, we found that salt was a great preservative. One way to keep salt in our diets, therefore, was to carry salt in our meats, vegetables, and these amazing dairy products called butter and cheese. Salt was important because it meant that we had to worry less about food poisoning, but, mostly, the preserved foods became convenient ways to make sure that we had that most basic dietary need covered. WE had salt. And today we hear that this tattered crowd, the spoils of society, gathered on a hillside, are the salt of the earth. They are a basic need of our society.

Then Jesus tells this group, many of whom had leprosy and other crippling diseases, “You are the light of the world,” light—another thing we need to survive and prosper. Natural light provides vitamin D which gives us strong bones and healthy upright postures. It prevents rickets and helps produce healthy skin tissue.

And artificial light is very dear at the time. It is expensive and not always available. At the time Jesus declares these people are valuable, the cost of fifteen minutes of artificial lamp oil cost about a day’s salary. (Just think about how high our light bill would be these days if that were still true.) But this light that Jesus is speaking of is not artificial light. It is the true light from heaven that shines through us, and yet, it is not our light, it is shared light. This light that is being named comes from Christ’s self and is about to change the world. 

These words are particularly good news to the crowd because these people are ones who have been trampled on most of their lives. They have been covered up and ignored. They have been pushed aside and hidden away in segregated parts of their world, and now they are being told that they are the essential ingredients for life itself. No longer are they to be tasteless, trampled people. No longer are they to skulk around in the dark corners. Jesus tells them to stand up and be counted, not hidden under a bushel basket. They are to be part of the fulfillment of God’s great creation. They are to be valued as God’s people gathered for the sake of the world.

These people who have been blessed, who have known God’s presence in their lives, are now being told what it means to be identified as a disciple. Again, it means that they need to stand up and be counted; they should not allow themselves to be covered up, hid from the world; but they are to find their place on the lamp stand, the cross arms of the empty resurrection cross. These, indeed, are the words of revolution.

This revolution will take place in a way that says that the law cannot be thrown down, that one cannot freely go out rampantly disregarding the value of others, but that the law might be fulfilled. Jesus says, I have not come to abolish the law, but to fulfill it, to overwhelm it. The word in Greek is πληρόω (pleróō).  It means to be filled up to overflowing, like a woman’s womb when she is pregnant. Think about it, this fulfillment of the law is not only going to fill the space, but it is going to grow until it is so big that it has to come out into the world we live in. It is going to overwhelm the world. It is going to overflow into our world like Amos’ mighty streams of justice from the living waters of the baptismal font into the places where we work and live. Jesus says, I have not come to abolish the law, but to fulfill it, to make it pregnant, to make it flow over all of God’s people as the waters of the sea cover the ocean.

In this light, if you will excuse the pun, the fulfillment of the law is the demand that all of God’s children be able to participate in the kingdom of heaven, and that, yes, if we work to be inclusive of all of God’s children, then we will exceed the righteousness of the scribes and Pharisees who spent a great deal of time trying to discern who was in and who was out. This righteousness that we participate in is the righteousness of Christ himself, and this righteousness breaks the rules of the scribes and the Pharisees to fulfill the law so that all might be part of the kingdom of heaven. This is not a there-and-then kingdom of heaven, but a here-and-now kingdom of heaven that begins in the waters of Baptism and flows out through our lives. It is that divine place where we stand up and are counted as the children of God living for the sake of the world.

Let us continue to hold in our minds who is being spoken to. These are the ones who have been trampled underfoot. They are the ones who have lost their taste. They have all but lost their hope. The only hope they have is in the one who is seated on the hillside speaking to them and teaching them. So, it is not their saltiness that they are able to depend on, it is Christ’s saltiness.

They have been hidden away from the world, ignored, and shunned. They know it is not their light that is going to shine, but Christ’s light that will shine through them. They know their own righteousness has not gotten them anything, so it will be Christ’s righteousness that will prevail—the one who will die on the cross for their sins justifying them, making them right with Godself, the one who is raised up from the place of death into the world of everlasting, ever-living life in the kingdom of heaven that begins right now with the promise of the fullness, a πληρόω (pleróō) pregnant time of hope to come. It is not their righteousness. It is Christ’s righteousness that shows them the way to go. So, in all that they will do, it will be Christ that will do it, and through him, God’s kingdom, this kingdom of heaven will overflow into all that they and we do.

Now you might be saying to yourself, “This is wonderful for the people that heard Jesus speak and teach that day, but what about us today?” Some of you may identify with that broken group of people gathered on the hillside, but, if you can’t, I offer you a song I learned in Sunday School many years ago.

God sees the little sparrow fall,

It meets his tender view;

If God so loves the little birds,

I know God loves me too.

God loves me too, God loves me too,

I know God loves me too.

Because God loves the little birds, I know God loves me too.

God paints the lilies in the field,

And shapes each little bell;

If God so loves the little flowers,

I know we’re loved as well.

God loves us too, God loves us too,

I know God loves us too;

Because God loves the little glowers,

I know God loves us too.

God loves the lame, the deaf, the blind,

And offers life anew;

If God can love these hidden ones,

I know God loves us too.

God loves us too, God loves us too,

I know God loves us too;

Because God loves the hidden ones,

I know God loves us too.

God made the little birds and flowers,

And all things great and small;

God won’t forget his little ones,

I know God loves us all.

God loves us all. God loves us all.

I know God loves us all;

Because God loves the little ones,

I know God loves us all.

BELLY UP TO THE BAR

THE ANGELUS TRUMPET            POLITICS

The Unexpurgated Source for Alternative Bible Facts

 

BELLY UP TO THE BAR

Dateline: Galilee, February 12, 05:21:37

by Matt Hughes

Josh Kristy, following his sensational statements on fashion last Saturday, turned to politics, proposing radical policies with potentially serious consequences. It appears that Kristy not only endorses some of the most stringent gun laws ever, but he wants to litigate anger, insults, and the use of fool in common parlance. Initial response to this part of Kristy’s proposal has resulted in the cancelation of all re-runs of The A Team until further notice.

Kristy also addressed current societal standards on adultery. He called for eye enucleation and right hand amputations for anyone guilty of objectifying women and other lustful behavior. This should significantly reduce teenage male populations in public or, alternatively, significantly increase the need for prosthetic devices for one-handed half-blind youth. When asked about these new policies, G. Otto Bohner said, “There are worse members to lose.” Kristy also charged that divorce is an agent of adultery and challenges chastity standards.

In another statement, Kristy called on his groupies to jam the legal system by not swearing to the veracity of anything they say in court. This could challenge truth-telling in our time. Asked to comment, Bar Association spokesperson Sue M. Dailey said, “Personally I think it’s great. I can foresee many more billable hours for attorneys across the country, not to mention therapists running anger management groups. Litigation challenging the constitutionality of hate language vs freedom of speech will also raise the standard of living for lawyers and paralegals. Even his stand on mediation settlements without contest will make plea bargaining and plea management a preferred occupation. It is the first really encouraging proposal for lowering prison censuses throughout the land. This could be the biggest thing for lawyers ever because it criminalizes accepted behavior and then decriminalizes the punitive consequences with what could be a very intricate structure of graduated financial penalty. It’s a win-win for litigators everywhere.”

Please Pass the Salt, OR What Color is Your Lamp Shade?

THE ANGELUS TRUMPET           STYLE

The Unexpurgated Source for Alternative Bible Facts

 

Please Pass the Salt, OR What Color is Your Lamp Shade?

February 5, 05:13:20

by Matt Hughes  

Who can forget Lot’s wife and the consequences of looking back? Yet in an ambiguous, even obfuscating, Orwellian double-speak statement, Joshua Kristy focused the crowd’s attention Saturday when he called them “salt of the earth.” Many people weren’t certain whether it was a compliment or the greatest slam.

Sources within the Kristy camp, however, made clarifying remarks stating that Kristy was speaking in “interior design short hand as-it-were.” It appears that “SALT” is an acronym for Stunning Alternative Lighting Treatments and to be “the SALT of the earth,” is simply a way of saying that you are fully living in your time and current trends. Apparently, to lose one’s saltiness and taste is simply a way of saying that people are not keeping up with current design trends and are totally out of fashion.

With this illuminating clarification, the rest of Kristy’s monologue concerning lighting and the basic rules of lighting in the home make much more sense.

1. Unless you are trying for that night time glow on your garden paths, or night-lighting a hallway leading to the bathroom for safety’s sake, lights need to be up high.
2. Bushel baskets are not effective light treatments unless you cut the bottoms out of them. With the bottoms removed, these baskets become quite attractive lamp shades creating an ambient glow as the light radiates through the natural intervals of the weave and, in some cases, enlivens the material itself.
3. With LEDs, mini lights can be inserted into the shade creating images of constellations and representations of the cosmological multiverse we live in. By arranging several lamps in any given room, the full magnificence of our heavenly kingdom is displayed.
4. These are not new rules for lighting, but they do enhance our lives creating attractive, even educational, opportunities for social gatherings.
5. By adapting just a few of these SALT ideas, you can surpass the righteous work of designers in the past.

Mount  crowd members claim this SALT summit meeting to be enriching and savory. Trumpet financial consultants predict a significant bump in the lighting and underwater basket weaving industries. More to come as further analysis continues.