Who is Old McDonald?

THE ANGELUS TRUMPET
The Unexpurgated Source for Alternative Bible Facts   

Who is Old McDonald?

Dateline: Capernaum, July 16, 13:01:18

by Matt Hughes 11:16:19:25:30

Tensions are rising in Kingdom of Dodd enterprises as the whereabouts of Jean Baptiste continue to elude investigators. After his arrest, authorities took Jean Baptiste to an unknown location to await trial. Rumors suggest that he is being held incognito in Herod’s underground prison known only as the Pit or that he has been banished and is in confinement somewhere in the Decapolis. In the meantime, the search continues, and Kingdom of Dodd’s Josh Kristy continues to raise awareness of humanitarian issues surrounding Baptiste’s incarceration.

We caught up with Kristy yesterday on the beach. A large crowd had gathered to hear him speak. We thought that we might be able to get an interview with him, but he eluded the crowds and us by getting into a boat and pulling away from the shore.

When he stood up in the boat he introduced a new song which the people immediately picked up,

Old McDonald had a farm, ee-igh-ee-igh-oh,
And on that farm, he planted seed, ee-igh-ee-igh-oh.
With a few seeds here, and a few seeds there,
Here some seeds, there some seeds,
Everywhere we’re throwing seeds.
Old McDonald had a farm, ee-igh-ee-igh-oh.

He threw some seeds upon the path, ee-igh-ee-igh-oh,
And on the rocks, where they would not last,
ee-igh-ee-igh-oh.
In the thistles here, and the hedgerow there,
In the brush, in the weeds,
Everywhere we’re throwing seeds.

Old McDonald had a farm, ee-igh-ee-igh-oh.
He broadcast seeds upon the field, ee-igh-ee-igh-oh,
On fertile ground and got the yield, ee-igh-ee-igh-oh.
With a bushel here, and a bushel there,
Here is wheat, there is wheat,
Everywhere we gather wheat.
Old McDonald had a farm, ee-igh-ee-igh-oh.

Following this rousing sing-a-long, Kristy spoke to the crowd saying, “Our attempts to find and release Jean Baptiste have been unsuccessful thus far, but we continue to hope that our investigations will bear good fruit. We need your help in locating Jean in order for justice to prevail. To aid you in your search, the Kingdom of Dodd will provide all of you here today with NU-Tone hearing aids and NU-Vision glasses so that you might better hear the news of Baptiste’s whereabouts and see signs of Baptiste’s imprisonment.” 

In a final comment, Kristy said, “No matter the outcome, the Kingdom of Dodd is here to stay. KoD is committed to a better life for all of us. Now go, see what is happening in the world, and hear the news in the Kingdom of Dodd.”