THE ANGELUS TRUMPET
The Unexpurgated Source for Alternative Bible Facts
INTO THE MIDST OF WOLVES
Dateline: Ole Land? July
2, 10:40:42
by Matt Hughes
by Matt Hughes
Kristy concluded instructing his followers today. Before sending them out into the newest sales field for Kingdom of Dodd NU-Food lifestyle products, he prepared them for the kind of reception they are likely to encounter. Kristy reminded them, in very descriptive words, that he was sending them out as Simple, Honest, Enterprising, Evangelical Privateers (S.H.E.E.P.) into a society of Wily Old Lovers of Vices and Existential Sufferings (W.O.L.V.E.S.).
Kristy charged S.H.E.E.P. to always be polite, “Remember, you represent a product that is much bigger than yourselves. You are the Kingdom of Dodd for the people you meet.” If they do the job well, Kristy promised they would be rewarded with a better commission when the people thanked them for making their lives easier and mentioned their name while ordering new products.
Kristy also assured his followers that if they are in it for the profits, they would get profit rewards and their earnings would be hugely righteous. In the meantime, they should abstain from alcohol, drinking only water.
Some speculate that Kristy’s S.H.E.E.P. will soon be fleeced in this latest pyramid scheme. Others claim that the Kingdom of Dodd lifestyle is crucial if we want to live in a self-sustaining, eco-friendly world.
Kristy charged S.H.E.E.P. to always be polite, “Remember, you represent a product that is much bigger than yourselves. You are the Kingdom of Dodd for the people you meet.” If they do the job well, Kristy promised they would be rewarded with a better commission when the people thanked them for making their lives easier and mentioned their name while ordering new products.
Kristy also assured his followers that if they are in it for the profits, they would get profit rewards and their earnings would be hugely righteous. In the meantime, they should abstain from alcohol, drinking only water.
Some speculate that Kristy’s S.H.E.E.P. will soon be fleeced in this latest pyramid scheme. Others claim that the Kingdom of Dodd lifestyle is crucial if we want to live in a self-sustaining, eco-friendly world.
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