KoD Counters Terrorist Tactics

THE ANGELUS TRUMPET

The Unexpurgated Source for Alternative Bible Facts

KoD Counters Terrorist Tactics

by Matt Hughes 
Dateline: Capernaum, July 30, 13:31:33:44:52

At a press conference today, Dir. T. Farmer of Kingdom of Dodd (KoD) NU-Food Paradise Farms responded to agri-terrorist activities by the now self-acknowledged work of Earth Vandals & Looters, known as EVaL 1. Farmer announced counter-terrorist plans saying, “We have decided that the practices of EVaL 1 need to be met with positive resistance. We will turn their practices back upon them and let their own practices destroy them. Therefore, we have introduced a weed of our own into their field of CHAoS (Chronically Hostile Agri-organism System). This weed will spread throughout their network like mustard on the roadside.

“We will also be infiltrating their network of dissidents with our own undercover agents until they are no longer able to trust themselves. We will claim our good seed treasure in their fields and find ways to take those fields back. This great pearl of wisdom, reflecting best practice strategies for defeating EVaL 1, comes from our own Mia Rohr Farmer, my daughter-in-law.”

Mia Rohr Farmer, a development team leader, reflects, “These latest efforts from Paradise Farms covert ops have the potential benefit of totally neutralizing the works of EVaL 1. Yet, unlike their toxic invasives, our product will provide healthy ground cover and a needed habitat for ground fowl and other birds as well as shelter for the local Leporids. Instead of introducing sickness and death, this counter-terrorist action will help to establish a balanced eco-friendly bio-diverse environment.

“At some later date, a team will need to come in and sort out the totally beneficial from the undesirable invasives, but that job is best left to those who will come after us. For now, it is enough to know that EVaL 1 can be contained.”

Dir. T. Farmer closed the press conference with a positive thought, “In years to come, people will think that the KoD Paradise Farms were always like this.”